Beneath the make-up and behind the smile, I'm just a girl who wishes for the world.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Overwhelming.

As my title has spoken, I am a bit overwhelmed. But, it's in a good way. If there is such a way to be. 

In a couple days, I move yet again. Samuel and I have bought out first home together. It's really a magically and exciting time. It's a huge step in our relationship, prior then to becoming one in marriage which will be happening in June of this upcoming year. The house isn't huge, but it is a bit bigger then our current apartment. The house has 3 bedrooms, one large master with a walk-in closet that I am happy to have. It only has a full bath & a half, but that's enough for us. We don't really plan on having a family in this home, it's just a starter one for us. If we do have a child, it'll just be one, and it won't be for very long. The house is a flip house, so it's been just about redone to it's roots. The kitchen is the most spectacular out of everything in my opinion. They redid the whole thing, and they chose the cabinets very well. There are a few things around the house that need some help from us that the Sellers wouldn't fix but it's nothing that Sam and I can't handle. 


Other then that stressful experience, we both have also started our last year of Undergrad. I'm in my Senior year now, and I'm really excited and anxious about it. I hope this year flies by so I can start applying for Graduate school at IPFW and hopefully, cross my fingers, get in and start my studies towards gaining my Masters Degree in Marriage & Family Counseling. It's either that degree or a more general Mental Health Counseling degree. Until then, I just need to get through my last year day by day. I am taking 5 online courses and one course on-campus this semester. Then next semester I'm hoping to take 4 online and 1 on-campus. The online courses help me with my boatload of stuff going on in my life, and I find them easier to get through. The courses are much shorter, and I can concentrate a lot easier when I sit down in my office and actually look at everything in front of me, instead of being surrounded by friends in a classroom on a fun campus. 


The last thing that has brought me to this overwhelming feeling is something I mentioned earlier. My wedding. Like I said, I am getting married in June and there are lots of planning and anxiety when it comes to planning a wedding. In reality, I have gotten so much accomplished and planned out and ready for the wedding, but in my mind I feel like I am so behind. I think up until the actual day, I will feel like I'm behind with something, which is crazy. I've got my ceremony location booked, my reception hall booked. I've got a deposit securing my DJ, Photobooth, and Cake all done. My dress is ordered and I've picked out my bridesmaid dresses with the help of some amazing ladies in my life. I've already spoken to my cousin who has agreed to doing our hair, and her twin, also my cousin whom is a photographer has agreed to do my wedding. I've really got a lot done, what's wrong with me? I'm pretty much a perfectionist, so I'm pretty sure that's the reason. The only things not done yet is my invitations being ordered, and then them being sent out. I don't have a complete list of people attending either, I'm waiting for one side of my family, but that's even not really that bad once I say it out loud. I still have 9 months. I'm good.... right?